“She’s got him on a short…”


I shall begin with the ‘middle’, erroneous as this may initially seem, making sure not to spoil the end.
And, what else could the ‘middle’ be in the case of Neuro-Linguistic Programming than – Yes, you guessed it! – The letter ‘L’.
Engulfed within ‘N’ and ‘P’, although proudly separate when following from the hyphen that leads and, indeed, ‘Linguistics’ for short.

Inexhaustible as the word may be in both meaning and application, it can prove quite a hot topic in many a context and discussion; formal or informal, business or casual, with family or friends.
It is one such occasion that led to the materialisation of this first blog post.

An occasion which, in retrospect, proved to be a linguistic experience that stemmed from an informal discussion between friends who, unaware of the ‘ending’, had no objective other than to have a good time, and which, incidentally, seemed to result in affecting their viewpoint, and possibly their attitude and behaviour towards how they lead themselves and others, and even their lives!

It was early in the afternoon, late lunch and desserts had been devoured, and conversation was as light as the company present wished it to be.
One of us, commenting on a celebrity couple that had been the topic of a typically insignificant ‘scandal’, used a simple everyday expression:
“She has him on a short leash.”

Cat, hailing from the UK and being somewhat of an ‘expert’ on the correct use of the English language, swiftly intervened and corrected our friend:

“You mean to say she had him on a short lead, Love, don’t you?”

Quantum Theory (representing the “Q” in EQnomics, short for Electro-Quantum-nomics) stipulate that the existence of anything is dependent on the observer noticing its existence at a specific point in space and time.
And Cat’s last comment, being among the observers, I noticed!

“What is the difference between a ‘leash’ and a ‘lead’?” I asked.
Notwithstanding the opinions exchanged, or those that one can find on the Net when referring to a dog, there is none!

Or is there?

You see, there is a distinct section of theory and practical applications in NLP, officially referred to as Sub-modalities; the finer characteristics of thought.
What this means, is that when we use language, although we might have a pre-agreed framework for the general meaning of a word, this framework does not necessarily include the details.

Take, for example, the simple statement: “There is a dog in the yard”.
We all know what a dog looks like, and most of us will have at a point in our lives been in a yard. However, this does not mean that our thought details of the phrase are identical.

For some the dog in their thoughts was black, for some it was brown, for others it may have had spots. The breed may have differed, the size, etc.
And, what about the yard? Or, the angle from which this picture was created in your mind, the time of day (light and shades), the sounds, etc.
It must now be clear that what you think is entirely your own, even if it is the same thing I am thinking!

Now how is any of this important for our story, some of you may wonder, while others might have suspected where this may be Leading.
You see, upon realising that when some walk their dog with a leash and others with a lead, I instantly began to wonder how this could be affecting their internal representation of what is “Leading”, and consequently ‘How a Leader Is’!

A Smartphone, a search engine and the Oxford English Dictionary were all employed for assistance. Among the definitions for the word ‘Lead’, the following everyday expressions were narrowed down:
1.      Leading the crowd. (The Leader is at the front.)
2.      Leading someone to the door. (The Leader is next to the other person.)
3.      Leading a dog. (The Leader is behind holding a lead.)

Once we realised how these expressions were affecting the way we were now thinking about the same thing, the wondering began…

Could it be possible that some of us that appear to be gifted leaders are simply different, more flexible or accepting minds that can identify and exhibit leadership on occasions were others do not?

We all paused for a second or two.
Someone said: “Hey, I am now managing this new project I was telling you about before, and now I may just have a new perspective of how to go about it!”

With our children’s voices in the background, we all could not help but think of how many more ways we had just identified, and that maybe we could teach them too.

Luckily my wife’s offering of espressos and home-made cheesecake helped our group return to our leisurely, post lunch, chat, however not before everyone acknowledged that a Leader for them is now, besides what it always was, a bit more, prompting me to quietly think that effective from that moment, we had all acquired some more ways to ponder, about how we LEAD.

Objective accomplished, I believe, since few of you must have understood from the very beginning that a post regarding a dog and a lead, Linguistics and Sub-modalities, that transpired during a late-lunch while beginning from the middle (and not the start, as is customary), would allow you to keep the views that you already have and also offer you some more; an ‘in-sight’ as to how YOU may choose to ‘lead yourself’. I am guessing in every way.

Create your days!
Nikolas G. Theodorou

PS. Some interesting questions:

1.      Is it possible that you are already ‘leading’ in a situation and you are unaware ofit?
2.      Is it possible that you are being ‘led’ in a manner that you do not recognise?
3.      Are you faced with the task to ‘lead’, and can now choose more tactics?

Get a new perspective on all the linguistic patterns you already know, by registering for our NLP squareone® Core Skills® Certified EQtraining®

and get all the information you need on our upcoming certified EQtraining® courses in English here and in Greek here!

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